Top 10 Best Break Up Songs

Boy and girl meet. They hang out all the time. They start falling in love. Somewhere down the line things just change for the worse. Break-ups, we've all been there at one point in time. Break-ups for me is a lot like death. I go through many stages of mourning until I can finally say I'm over it (and sadly, sometimes you never are actually "over it," you just learn to function without it). In my first stage I tend to listen to super depressing songs. Of course every song you hear reminds you of that one person. That person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with. Love em or leave em, here's my top 10 songs I listen to during a Break-Up.  Enjoy.

10.Dashboard Confessional - Screaming Infidelities

9. Swirl 360 - Okay

8. Social Distortion - Writing On The Wall

7. A Day To Remember - If It Means A Lot To You

I think when he sings the line, "I swear I'll never be happy again, and don't you dare say we can just be friends I'm not some boy that you can sway. We knew it'd would happen eventually," my heart just breaks.


6. Elvis Costello - I Want You

Great song but listening to this when you're really down it just bad news.


5. Keith Urban - You'll Think Of Me

4. the Cure - Pictures Of You

3. Bon Iver - Can't Make You Love Me/ Nick Of Time
Bonnie Raitt cover

2. Mayday Parade - Miserable At Best

1. Gavin Mikhail - Skinny Love
Bon Iver cover

There is something about the way he sings this that gets me every time. Once he goes off I lose it. Eyes instantly water. The last "break-up" I had I played this on repeat for days. I still play it when I'm upset.

Top 10 Romantic Movies to Cuddle Up To.

Oh that gap between Halloween and Christmas. What to do what to do?  The leaves are turning brown, hot sweaty short shorts weather drops, warm blankets are dug out of the closet. This is the time of year when all those singles start shacking up. Relying on close snuggling with one another to stay warm in the dropping temperatures. I, for one, have been looking forward to this for months. So grab your guy/girl, a nice bottle of wine and curl up on the couch for some good ol' cuddling and movie time. Here's our top 10 picks for the most romantic movies!

10. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 

It's a classic tale. Guy meets girl. They quickly fall in love. Heartbreak. Girl erases guy from memory? Wait what? At one point in time, I'm sure many of us have wished something like this actually existed. How would a movie about such heartache, that makes you want to kill yourself through half of it, make it into my list?  While our main character (played by the amazing Jim Carrey) discovers his ex girlfriend had him erased from her memory he decides he's going to do the same. During the process, however, they start erasing the memories of the moments the two of them shared while falling in love. Before all the fighting and hatred was this amazing relationship; a reminder of why we fall in love with someone to begin with. He tried desperately to hold onto her the best he could. Fade to black. There's something about two people just destined to be together that pulls on my little heart strings.

9. Pretty In Pink

 The high school nobody that lands the popular jock. Of course you see this in a movie because it doesn't happen in real life. Well at least not until after you graduate and your once dorky looks and awkward body are now pretty damn nice.  Suck on that one, Jordan! Who's flat chested now?!!!!  Sorry. Anyways... back to the Brat Pack. This movie is cute and funny and who doesn't love Ducky and his desperately sad longing for Andie? A night in well spent.

8. Bull Durham

A movie that mixes love and baseball? IN! Now I wouldn't mind being in a love triangle with two ball players, but only if their names were David Wright and Jake Arrieta. yum.

7. Bonnie and Clyde

What small town kinda gal wouldn't love to be picked up by a bad ass rebel and thrust into a life of  romantic excitement?  Bonnie and Clyde had a connection from the start. So passionate and infatuated with one another until the tragic end. If you're going to go out, you may as well go out while gazing into the eyes of the one you love in a hail of bullets. 

6. Say Anything

God the 80's did it best. Music, RomCom's and the sweet hair do's. Okay, so John Cusack may make me want to punch babies every time he opens his mouth, but he's more tolerable in this. Diane was a girl that did it all right. Valedictorian in high school, fellowship in Europe; parents dream. Then she meets young Lloyd, a rambling man with no huge life long goals or dreams. Yeah, daddy no like. After some ups and downs (and IRS issues) our leading lady has to make some decisions. Okay blah blah on the movie. The only scene that makes me do a typical girl "awwwwww" thing is that magic moment where "In Your Eyes" blast through that boombox. 100 minutes? Well worth it.

5. Titanic

Rich or poor  you can't escape love. 

I still remember having to hear that Celine Dion song over and over again on the radio. The girls leaving the theater crying their eyes out wishing some guy loved them enough to stay in that freezing water. (I still think Rose should've moved her fat ass enough for both of them to fit on the floating door). This movie shows the ladies what real chivalry is. A time when guys didn't think romance was a Dutch Oven in bed at night. No no. A real man would go above and beyond to show you how much he cared no matter the obstacles.

4. Love Affair 

We see it in so many movies of today. You meet someone, fall in love and then something separates you, but fear not, you're going to meet at some specified time in the future. Well this is the movie they ALL ripped it from. Michel meets American singer Terry. Although the two are engaged they just can't stop their feelings. They agree to meet at one of the most romantic places... the Empire State building (don't knock it unless you've been there. It's amazing). Now of course, things can't always go the way we would like them to. I would usually spoil the ending and assume you all have seen this, but I know many of you probably haven't and I think this should be done with your boo STAT!. 

3. Brokeback Mountain

Why does love only have to be between the men and women? On this site, we're all about people expressing, believing and fucking whomever the hell they would like to!!  Plus I have seen movies of men and women where their love couldn't even touch this. The connection and love the two of them shared was just amazing. I wish I had someone that felt a fraction for me the way Jack felt about Ennis. Their love was forbidden and they didn't let it stop them... well it stopped Jack in the end but I don't want to talk about it because I may cry again.

2. The Notebook

Man, where do I even begin with this one? Oh yeah, Ryan Gosling. Probably hands down the most perfect man alive. I mean come on! He plays piano, rescues women in the street, and don't get me started on those abs! (hold on. I need a moment please) Phew okay now back to the movie...   We all hear about "love at first sight."  We all want to be loved and find the perfect person for us. The one that will love us until the day we die. Noah and Allie fell in love, were separated and then were reunited by chance. This movie shows that true love doesn't just disappear; it stays there forever.  I can only hope that I too will on day find that someone. That someone to grow old with. That someone that will sit with me on a daily basis and make sure that we have that one last moment of 'true love' before we pass. (okay guys, if you decide to watch this with your lady you better be prepared to be compared to him and step up your game a bit).

1. Casablanca

"Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine."

One of my favorite movies of all time. Oh damn us women. We just break hearts over and over again. Poor Rick finds the love of his life and loses her only to have her thrown back into it. All of these emotions hidden so deep inside just bottling up to the surface. It sucks losing the one you love. What sucks more? Seeing them in the arms of someone else. Even more? Sending them away to live out the rest of their lives in happiness while you are left at an airport with nothing. 

 

"Here's looking at you, kid"

Love, Anonymous.

Can We Be Friends?

While on my way to work this morning, I was listening to the radio and they were talking about men and women having friends of the opposite sex while being in a relationship. When I first heard this I had an immediate response; of course guys and girls can be friends with opposite genders. Why not? But after a few minutes and hearing some of these stories I stood slightly undecided. I, myself, have a lot of male friends that I enjoy hanging out with. Some of which I have known for over 10 years. So when i think about them and hanging out I don’t see anything wrong with it. Then I started to think about the guy I’m dating. He also has a ton of female friends. Some of which I know well and like a lot and others I’ve never met or even heard of. He gets a text here, a call there, but they never actually meet up and go out together (which may be why I have no issues about it). To be completely honest, I’ve not really had to deal with him going out alone with the girls we mutually know either. So i don’t really know how I would actually feel about it. But how far is too far? What is acceptable to do in a relationship and what isn’t?  One of the stories I heard today was of a man who had sent flowers to a woman he worked with. He got caught and swore nothing was going on. They were just close friends and he knew she was going through a rough patch and was trying to do something nice for her.  Acceptable or not?

Now the guy I’m dating is in the “industry.” And as many of you know, being in the “industry” means a lot of dinner and drink meetings with people. Sometimes with people you barely even know, which I’ve been told, feels similar to going out on a first date. This is something I’ve not had to deal with before while dating someone but he’s always been super honest with me about it. He let’s me know who it’s with and what it’s for. I don’t even have to ask. So therefore I feel I don’t have to worry.

I decided today to ask a few of my friends about it and people were mixed. Some agreed with me that you should always let your partner know and others felt that there’s no need to have to share that information with them. It’s their own prerogative to go out with whomever they wish and their significant other has no say.

This led me to another question...
If you tell your other that you are “going out with a friend” when in actuality you are just going out with one friend who is a member of the opposite sex to avoid the interrogation is it a lie? You did say you were going out with a friend but you neglected to say that friend was a certain gender. And when hanging out when does it cross the line? Going to dinner alone? Watching a movie at the house? Club? Party? Daily texts or emails, IM'ing all day?  

I  talked to a friend of mine today (a guy) about girls hanging out alone with “guy friends” and  I held my ground with the argument of, “I don’t want to hook up with them and would never let anything happen so what does it matter?” He said something to me that made me understand it a little better, “all guys, no matter if you place them in the friend only zone or not, only think with one part of their body. If given the chance they WILL fuck you. Whether it ruins a friendship or not. They don’t just hang out to hang out. It’s never as innocent as you may think it is or wish it was.” So now I can understand a little bit of where the jealousy comes from. But him saying that just makes me wonder now... if my guy wants to hang out with a “friend” is that all that’s going through his head too?  Thoughts?

Love, 

Anonymous

Top 10 Sexiest Halloween Costumes!

Oh it's that special time of year again. That wonderful time when children go begging for candy, the leaves are turning beautiful colours and women all over the world are dressing up like giant skanks. Of course we all know the rule; this is the day of the year where women can dress this way and totally get away with it without judgement. (well mainly no judgement)

Everyone has their different ideas of what sexy is. Well here's our list. See what you think...

10.Sin City

Who doesn't remember Jessica Alba all sweaty dancing it up? Guy or girl it got your blood flowing. Just make sure you got the body and moves to go with it!



9.  Wonder Woman

Hot Hot Hot. What guy doesn't dream of being rescued by a sexy super hero in a tight top and booty shorts? Oh and did I mention she has a whip? Oh I'm sorry nerds, a magic lasso. 

8. Sexy Pirate

 

Arr there she blows! Or at least you boys will wish she was.

7. Ninja Babe Turtle

Okay, so maybe it's a little nerdy but so what. I think it's hot!!. Sure some of you guys would say "go with April O'Neil" but no. I think this is enough to get me going. 

6.Baseball Player

Describe the perfect woman? A girl that likes beer and sports! Well here's one for you guys. Meet a girl like this, buy her a few drinks and maybe you too will go all the way home. 

5. Nurse

um yeah I think I have a fever. Let's see anyone turn down a girl in this to fluff their pillows and give them a sponge bath.

4.  Mortal Combat Kitana

Oh come on guys. Don't act like when you played Mortal Combat in your early teen boner popping years that you didn't wish just once a sword would knock off this lethal Asian hotties top. Well now you get to see the life sized version. Let's just hope an announcer will end the night saying "finish him"

 

 

3. Cop

Breaking the law!!!  Where do we sign up? Who doesn't want a bad ass woman dominating them?
And more importantly who doesn't want a bad ass woman with handcuffs dominating them?


2. Sexy School Girl

Of course we have to have this one here. Always a favorite with the men. Good girls gone bad. If the girls looked and dressed more like this in high school I bet the guys would've had perfect attendance.


1.  Nun

Forgive me father for I have sinned... or at least come Halloween night I plan on  doing a lot of it.

Not Even Time Can Fix Some Things

I’ve known my friend, we’ll call him Max, since I was 16. Max was quite
a bit older than I was, but as I grew up, we became closer.  (I feel
like I have to preface this story, with nothing physical ever happened
between us. Ever. )

Now that that is out of the way, for the past 9 years, I have had this
man in and out of my life. We’ve gone through fights where we’ve
yelled, cried, and even stopped speaking for an extended period of
time. For 9 years, this man has been one of my absolute best friends.
He has seen my ups and downs, and my trials and tribulations. He has
been there through my fights with my parents,  boyfriends, and
friends. Our friendship will forever remain in a special place
in my heart for the things that we have shared.

However, when is the point, when the last fight you have, is just one
too many? When the words that come out of their mouth is just too much
for you to handle? When they take zero responsibility for the things
they have said, and try to turn it around on you, for it just to be
too much?

When do you realize, that as much as you love someone, you can’t love
them in the way that they need? How do you just give up someone you
have known for so long?  Is there a way to get over that kind of loss?

I still don’t have the answer to many of these. Or any of them, for
that matter.


What I do know: Our friendship and connection will never be found in
another soul. The talks we had, the experiences we shared – I know,
that I will never have with anyone else.

I figured as time went by, and he and I stopped talking, that
eventually I would realize that he and I together, were just not a
good combination. But how can you say that, when this person was
your best friend for so long? Our friendship/relationship was based
around music. There are songs to this day, that when hearing, all I
can do, is pick up the phone, and want to text him a line.

But then. I remember. I put the phone down.

I have to constantly remember the things he said to me, and not put
myself back in that situation. I need to remind myself that I deserve friends who will treat
me better and the way I deserve to be treated.


There are parts of my soul and my life, that no one will ever know, as
well as he does. Nor do I feel like telling a story can communicate
the things that I went through.  So many times, I took him back in to
my life, knowing the pain it would eventually cause me. Knowing that
our friendship had reached its expiration date. I loved this man more
dearly, and intensely, than I can put into words.

He has a son, who I watched grow up. His son is autistic, and I was
one of the few people he would allow to carry him, hold his hand, and
interact with.  For all of the other flaws that he has, he is one of
the most amazing parents I have ever seen. When the three of us were
out together, people thought we were a family. And, honestly, we were.

So, when is enough, enough? When do you cut the cord, and, do you ever recover?
If I find out, I’ll let you know….

Skeez, if you’re out there, this is for you
“But now I realize forever that you're my friend
No matter what you will never leave me to fend
I don't know much but I know we will be
As happy as a 1950's TV family
Except times infinity”

Love, Anonymous

True Love Isn't For Everyone…Or Is It?

I don't want to start this post out as a cynic, but I am. The older I get, the more I’m beginning to realize that true love may not be for everyone. Many get the opportunity to enrich and share their lives with that one special person, while others spend their lives in a sailboat waiting to reel in their biggest catch.

Love is that intense feeling of deep affection that most people yearn for in their lives. Who wouldn’t want this? Whether it comes from our family, friends, profession or partner – love is that one thing we all want at the end of the day. Even greater than love is finding that one true love – that person who will forever take your breath away and in-turn move mountains for you. Fairy tale descriptions aside, finding true love is finding your partner, your best friend, the person who you can drink slurpee’s with until your brain can’t handle any more freezes.

Beginning at conception and continuing into my adult life, love was constantly felt from my family and friends. In fact, I fell in love for the first time at 17. What I thought was true love ended up fading three years later – partly due to our immaturity and differences in life. Since then, I haven’t found that mutual love that many around me have.

As the years continue to pass me by, I’ve seen so many of my dearest family members and friends experience that one true love that I’ve always hoped to attain. Granted, some of those relationships haven’t all worked out, but the love was there and didn’t go unnoticed. With each new relationship, I’ve become that much more hopeful that my time is waiting for me just around the corner. However in the past year, I’ve begun to think that maybe we aren’t all meant to fall in love. Too many disappointments and heartbreaks have crumbled my faith and left me with little hope.

We all are dealt a different hand of cards and who’s to say that your hand has the queen of hearts in it? Odds are, it may not. Our lives have the ability to encompass many great things, but perhaps some people are just not meant to fall in love. Maybe I’m just not meant to experience true love.

A dear friend recently told me to stop running and evaluate my life. What mistakes have I made, what changes should I make, what will help shape me into the person I hope to be by 30? Many of these questions remain uncertain, but the running path has cleared too much for me to stop running; true love just isn’t for everyone.

The realist in me believes this to be the true. Albeit, the dreamer in me hopes the realist trips over and falls, leaving the dreamer to prevail.

Love,

Anonymous

It's not you, it's me

Have you ever heard this ridiculous break up line? I certainly have and one too many times.

I’m not big on the lasting relationship front; in fact, I’ve only been with three people that have actually lasted longer than a month. All of them were those “we’re not really dating but we kind of are” type thing to boot. (Yeah, they blow) But at the end of all of them I’ve heard the same shit, “You’re amazing,” “you’re everything I would want in a girlfriend,” “you love sports,” “you let the little shit slide and don’t argue,” “you’re pretty,” “people like you,” blah blah blah.

I definitely bought it the first time (felt bad for the guy being so confused), questioned the second (wait a minute, dejavu?), but by my third go around, come on! Come up with something better guys. I know you all have it in you. I wouldn’t have been into you if you weren’t the slightest bit clever.

After hearing this numerous times, you can’t help but to get a little irritated! It’s just so damn lame!

The guy gets off clean and easy here. He plays on your emotions trying to convince you that he’s going through some emotional confusion and being oh so thoughtful of you. How sweet of him. He spews crap from his lips, believing you’re falling for it. He rambles nonsense that he is being the better person by letting you know it’s his issues that are causing the split, but in reality, he knows as well as you now think…it’s me.

I’m sorry, but if someone was that “perfect” as he claims you were, he would want to stay with you
and allow this perfect person to work through this WITH him and not insulting your intelligence as he hit’s on his next victim. Guys, you need to realize that’s nothing but a slap in the face to us ladies. Have he man balls to actually say why you don’t want to be with the other person… Have the man balls to respect that there are 2 people involved who have FEELINGS and ISSUES…Understand that we are no longer children pretending to fall in love or learning what they think love is…We are adults seeking our “person” and your lame, “it’s me”, only adds to both of our confusion as to who we are seeking and why. If I was so “perfect” once, then respect me and be honest. If you were just looking to get laid all along and used me, admit it rather than continue to blow smoke up the ass you enjoyed at my cost. In fact, if it was just my ass that was “perfect” from the beginning, admit that too..It comes down to RESPECT. You owe it to the life you decided to fuck with. Be a man, come on, think about it… I’m sure here was a reason.

I feel I always have been “that girl,” you know her, the one you just like to fuck but would never actually bring home to meet the parents. In fact, I was once told: “there are girls you bring home to mom and dad and girls you just fuck… you’ll never meet my parents” (yes, one of the top three shittiest things ever said to me. The other two are actually worse but we’ll keep those for a different day).

What puts me there? I have no idea. But maybe if these “lover’s that care so much for me” would ever be truthful I would be able to figure it out.

Difficult to admit, but yes, I’m waiting for someone to finally stop trying to be the good guy and just tell me some truths. By being put in the dark to spare feelings, I’m left with wondering and guessing. I’ve started thinking lately that maybe it’s karma. I can’t lie; when I was a tad younger, I was a complete asshole too. I had my heart broken once and that was enough for me. Instead of dealing with it in a healthy manner like we should, I sought out revenge on every man that would come into my life for the next 8 years. I would make them fall for me and then I would be the biggest bitch you’d ever seen. It was all a game to me. Boys were nothing more than play things. So maybe I deserve the shitty excuses and lack of commitment that I’m getting now. But at least, as I grow up, I have committed to learning from my mistakes. Who knows how that goes, but when Karma is finally done reaping its havoc, I would like to have a normal relationship. I would like to have a first date, because in all actuality, I have never had one that didn’t lead to a bar or another one night hook up. I have never had a guy offer to pick me up, take me to dinner and do all the corny things people do on a first date. I have never had that cliché first night awkward kiss. I have never had that “few days later” call or text saying how much fun it was to meet me and we should do it again. Those are things I once made fun of, and yet, they are the things I wish I could actually experience at some point in my life. I don’t think this can ever happen unless the men are willing to grow up too!

Love,

Anonymous.

I Want A Superpower

When I was younger, up until about the age of 18, there were always a few things in life that bothered me. Among those things were, and in no particular order; high school, not understanding how things worked, girls, having to have a job and most of all  not being able to have a  superpower. You know, the kind of super power where you could read that stunning girl in your classes mind, did she like you or did she think you were a dick. Or the superpower where you had x-ray vision and you could peer through that stunning girls clothes as she sat in class thinking you were a dick…. you got the better of her there buddy! Or the one where you could turn invisible and sneak around watching pretty girls shower or the one where you could control people’s minds getting them to do whatever you want…. As you can probably tell this could go on for the entire blog in itself and most of the superpowers would revolve around girls or getting ridiculously rich, in which case then you get those pretty girls quite easily anyway.
    It was not until college that I realized that I did in fact, have a superpower. Thankfully, this was a superpower that was not going to get me arrested for sexual harassment or placed on the sex offenders registrar for sneaking into girls bathrooms to watch them shower. I have no doubt that if you scour that registrar you will find the Invisible Man in there somewhere. What was this superpower that took me 18 years to find you ask? It was the capacity to speak to girls in an authentic accent, have them hanging on my every word and occasionally dropping their panties.
    I should probably clear up that I moved to America from the United Kingdom (not telling you what part, but not the rubbish southern bit) when I was 18 to study. Up until then I had had success with girls but never on the same level that I was about to encounter due to my new found superpower. Quite literally, girls that I would never have even considered having a chance with, were dropping at my feet. Now I wouldn’t say I am ugly but I am certainly no Brad Pitt, and I know for a fact that it was this intriguing quirky accent that girls were finding so…. alluring, I guess would be the right word.
    It must be said that I was not the only person with this superpower and many of my foreign friends had the same experience with it. Often this ability tended to have the biggest effect on the same girls. A few select girls were known to have found their way into the same circle of guys with this incredible gift. Certain girls were immune to it, to others it was their kryptonite. These girls who were powerless to the accent could often be found in Irish Pubs dragging unsuspecting (wink wink) foreigners to the toilets as their superpower had once again worked its magic.
    One day of the year always yielded better results for me and my fellow men with an accent. March 17th. Mark it down on your calendar. Oh that’s right, it already is, St. Patricks day. It is on this hallowed day that even girls who were normally immune to the accent throughout the year became under its spell as the Guinness and whisky flowed. Threesomes would become regular occurrences, the 16d produced breakfast, lunch and dinner for a few men, a feat rarely accomplished. If you do not understand that analogy then shame on you! This was all down to having an accent and being slightly ballsy. Chicks dig it and we are more than happy to take full advantage.
    Girls are well aware of the powers that the accent holds. Many will question you in a bar as to whether you are really from such and such a place, ID has to be shown as proof (a passport is always a winner). Clearly, this shows that American men are well aware of the power of the accent as well, and if truth be told, some of them may be slightly jealous about it. Stories of men faking accents to get girls are common place, and I’ll be honest I have faked an accent before in my home country just to see the effect (it worked). I have nearly been in a couple of fights because girls will talk to me and my friends over American guys just because I have an accent, in that situation the superpower is a curse.
    At the end of the day the accent is an enigma, harking back to the beginning one of the other things that bothered me was not knowing how things work. Why is it that I have been blessed with such a superpower? What is it that makes women go weak at the knees at the dulcet tones of a Scottish, Irish and occasionally an English accent? Why do certain girls only go after guys with accents and do you grow out of it? Why do I automatically pay more attention to a girl when I hear that Georgia peach accent? Questions I am not sure I will ever find an answer to but right now I am happy with my superpower and the advantages that it gives me over the mere mortals.

Love, 

Anonymous

Confessions From A Former Hopeless Romantic

Dear Thirteen-Year-Old Me,


You've just started dating. Yes, be proud. Most parents don't even let their kids do that until they are way older and better equipped to emotionally handle the inevitable rejection and jealousy that comes with being immature and fumbling around blindly in this thing we call 'love.' In many ways, you are a better version of a future lover/husband/partner than I am now at 28.

Why, you ask? Well, for starters, you're still vulnerable enough to actually put energy into a relationship. Sure, in about a year you're going to have your heart ripped out, stomped on, and shoved back into your face... but, you'll now know what it means to love someone. You'll fixate on this failed relationship years later. Probably to the point that it eventually cripples you. But, hey, you will also be the first guy you know to get laid, and isn't that a worthwhile trade-off?

You still believe in love. At 28, you no longer will. A few horrible break-ups will do that to you. First will be the girl in college you told that you needed a break to figure out the shit in your head. You'll want her back. You will never get her back. You'll be too cautious with your heart that you'll miss out on chances you should have taken. Take those chances.

You still believe in romance. At 28, you no longer will. At 16, you'll write poetic love letters detailing your heart's every desire. If any of your football buddies found these, they would ridicule you to no end. At 20, you'll write poems. You'll never share these. They will be too raw and personal that you'll fear what others might say about them. At 28, you'll be numb. Write the letters, because years later you'll wish you had kept doing it.

You believe true love is the greatest thing worth chasing. That it is the most important thing we can do with our lives. At 28, you'll constantly put your career before every single relationship. Including the first girl you actually truly believed you wanted to marry. After you breakup, you'll spend a year cursing yourself for not putting her first, and looking back and wondering why you didn't just go dancing with her more, because you are self-conscious about your dance skills, your body and that you think you're not good enough for her. Dance, like no one else is watching.

You still believe in grand gestures. At 28, you'll be tired even trying to imagine ever needing a grand gesture because every asshole with an art degree and a Handy-cam will have maxed out the Internet with romance porn. Flash mob proposal? Children's choir in Central Park? Name it, it'll probably have already been done.

Emotional pain will make you cry. Soon. Believe me. You'll hide it from people because you think it makes you weak but at 28, you won't even remember the last time you shed a tear. Especially when it pertains to a relationship. Your girlfriend (and soon-to-be ex) will say it's because your relationship lacks passion. You'll say it's just because you're more mature now than you used to be. Cry if you need to, and don't be ashamed (even if it's while watching The Notebook).

You're afraid to ask girls out in person. This one you don't have to worry about. At 28, you'll get to do all of this with your phone and a little thing called Facebook messenger. It'll make us all callous and tear down any boundaries we might have... then again, maybe that's not something that's good at 28 either. Ask the pretty girls out. And if/when they say no, just tell yourself they're all whores and you're too good for them.

You used to dream in fairy tales. That you’d meet a girl in college, fall in love, graduate, and marry her. You’d have kids by 25 or 26. A house. A dog. By 28, you’ll question the entire idea of marriage. After your best friend gets divorced and married twice. After your boss gets divorced. After your grandfather starts online dating. After a close friend breaks up with his live-in girlfriend. You’ll realize driving to work one day that you’ll never be married for 50 years like your grandparents were. You’ll be closing in on 30, still single, and you’ll realize that you probably won’t live to be 80, which means the window for marrying someone and lasting 50 years will become an antique ideal you likely will never achieve. There’s nothing you can do about that, and it’s not worth trying to. Shit will happen when it’s supposed to happen... But, you will get a really kick-ass dog.

Don't ever stop being 13, least in your heart. It's the only time you'll ever be truly honest with yourself... at least, until it's too late to be honest. Keep these few life lessons in mind and you'll probably be just fine. Girls like guys who can be manly but still in touch with their emotions at 28. Stay a child in your heart and the rest will take care of itself.

Love,
Anonymous

My Quest To Find The G-Spot

So we’ve all heard about the elusive G-spot. Some magazines I’ve read call it a myth, but if any of you watch porn like I do, then I’m sure you have come across porn stars like Flower Tucci or Alisha Klass, who are better known as the “squirters.” The first time I had seen them -- I’m not even going to lie -- I was impressed and a little curious. I had never even come close to doing anything like that. Was I missing out? Was there something wrong with me? Were all the guys I had been with up until that point just not as good as I thought? 

I decided to ask a few of my female friends about it. Out of maybe 20 ladies, only two of them said they had ever had an orgasm so intense that they squirted, so I didn’t feel as bad anymore. Later that week, I went over to the house of the guy I was seeing. We were talking about the whole G-spot and squirting thing, and he kept going on about how hot it is and that if I did it then it would be a major turn on. Now I’m a very giving person in the bedroom, and if this is what he wanted, then I was determined to make it happen -- no matter how much practice it took. I was on a mission.

First things first: the Internet. I decided to go to a few sites and look up what positions work best for hitting the G-spot. If you're curious, this is where I looked: http://www.askmen.com/dating/love_tip_400/430_g-spot-positions.htm (I’m a huge askmen.com fan. What better way to learn how to please a man and learn new tricks than to get advice straight from them?)

 

Next, I looked up the G-Spot itself. I wanted to know more about it, other than what I had gotten from this guy. Thinking back, the only thing I can remember him saying was A) it’s hot and B) you’re going to feel like you have to pee right before it happens and you just have to go with it. Well, he was right. All the sites talked about many women having a problem reaching G-spot orgasms, because they weren’t able to let themselves go enough due to the pee factor (and some other emotional stuff that I wasn’t worried about).  

Now that the preliminary research was out of the way, it was time to see if trying these certain positions would work. I called up my guy, went over to his place and quickly got to business. After some pretty damn great sex and a lovely orgasm, I still didn’t achieve my goal. I’m going to blame it on being scared I was actually going to pee on him. These things get into your head and it’s hard to not think about it. Refusing to admit defeat, I let him know that we were going to keep trying.

 

For a while, I had been asking him if we could try a certain sex toy, so we took a trip to a sex shop. After spending a great deal of time giggling at the four-foot dildos in the store, we finally got what we came for. As I was cashing out, he called me over to show me this vibrator he had heard about that was supposed to help you achieve a G-spot orgasm. I figured if I could get one on my own and see what it felt like, maybe I could get out of my own head and finally squirt for him.

 

So later that night, after I left his place and went home, I was in bed. Of course, curiousity got the best of me. I ripped the package open and went to work. OH. MY. GOD. He was right. After a few minutes I finally saw what all the fuss was about. I actually had to stop using the device because I couldn’t handle it, and let me tell you ladies, it’s one of the greatest gifts you can ever give yourself.

 

Bottom line: if at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

 

(And get one of these. It will change your life.)

 

 

 

Love, Anonymous