It's not you, it's me

Have you ever heard this ridiculous break up line? I certainly have and one too many times.

I’m not big on the lasting relationship front; in fact, I’ve only been with three people that have actually lasted longer than a month. All of them were those “we’re not really dating but we kind of are” type thing to boot. (Yeah, they blow) But at the end of all of them I’ve heard the same shit, “You’re amazing,” “you’re everything I would want in a girlfriend,” “you love sports,” “you let the little shit slide and don’t argue,” “you’re pretty,” “people like you,” blah blah blah.

I definitely bought it the first time (felt bad for the guy being so confused), questioned the second (wait a minute, dejavu?), but by my third go around, come on! Come up with something better guys. I know you all have it in you. I wouldn’t have been into you if you weren’t the slightest bit clever.

After hearing this numerous times, you can’t help but to get a little irritated! It’s just so damn lame!

The guy gets off clean and easy here. He plays on your emotions trying to convince you that he’s going through some emotional confusion and being oh so thoughtful of you. How sweet of him. He spews crap from his lips, believing you’re falling for it. He rambles nonsense that he is being the better person by letting you know it’s his issues that are causing the split, but in reality, he knows as well as you now think…it’s me.

I’m sorry, but if someone was that “perfect” as he claims you were, he would want to stay with you
and allow this perfect person to work through this WITH him and not insulting your intelligence as he hit’s on his next victim. Guys, you need to realize that’s nothing but a slap in the face to us ladies. Have he man balls to actually say why you don’t want to be with the other person… Have the man balls to respect that there are 2 people involved who have FEELINGS and ISSUES…Understand that we are no longer children pretending to fall in love or learning what they think love is…We are adults seeking our “person” and your lame, “it’s me”, only adds to both of our confusion as to who we are seeking and why. If I was so “perfect” once, then respect me and be honest. If you were just looking to get laid all along and used me, admit it rather than continue to blow smoke up the ass you enjoyed at my cost. In fact, if it was just my ass that was “perfect” from the beginning, admit that too..It comes down to RESPECT. You owe it to the life you decided to fuck with. Be a man, come on, think about it… I’m sure here was a reason.

I feel I always have been “that girl,” you know her, the one you just like to fuck but would never actually bring home to meet the parents. In fact, I was once told: “there are girls you bring home to mom and dad and girls you just fuck… you’ll never meet my parents” (yes, one of the top three shittiest things ever said to me. The other two are actually worse but we’ll keep those for a different day).

What puts me there? I have no idea. But maybe if these “lover’s that care so much for me” would ever be truthful I would be able to figure it out.

Difficult to admit, but yes, I’m waiting for someone to finally stop trying to be the good guy and just tell me some truths. By being put in the dark to spare feelings, I’m left with wondering and guessing. I’ve started thinking lately that maybe it’s karma. I can’t lie; when I was a tad younger, I was a complete asshole too. I had my heart broken once and that was enough for me. Instead of dealing with it in a healthy manner like we should, I sought out revenge on every man that would come into my life for the next 8 years. I would make them fall for me and then I would be the biggest bitch you’d ever seen. It was all a game to me. Boys were nothing more than play things. So maybe I deserve the shitty excuses and lack of commitment that I’m getting now. But at least, as I grow up, I have committed to learning from my mistakes. Who knows how that goes, but when Karma is finally done reaping its havoc, I would like to have a normal relationship. I would like to have a first date, because in all actuality, I have never had one that didn’t lead to a bar or another one night hook up. I have never had a guy offer to pick me up, take me to dinner and do all the corny things people do on a first date. I have never had that cliché first night awkward kiss. I have never had that “few days later” call or text saying how much fun it was to meet me and we should do it again. Those are things I once made fun of, and yet, they are the things I wish I could actually experience at some point in my life. I don’t think this can ever happen unless the men are willing to grow up too!

Love,

Anonymous.