John was a rebound boyfriend that I had after my very difficult breakup with my former boyfriend of four years, Mike. I started going out with my friends a lot after my break up and was out at a bar one night when he and I hit it off. At first he seemed amazing. He said everything a girl wants to hear and did everything a girl wants done. He cooked for me, called me beautiful, took me out places, and seemed happy all the time. A month into the relationship he told me he loved me. I thought it to be a little soon and didn’t say it back right away. This upset him greatly so I started to feel obligated to say it. Then as time went on I thought I felt it. As the relationship progressed, things started to change. He began setting boundaries, getting mad when I hung out with guy friends, and made me feel guilty for anything I did. After Mike and I had broken up we remained friends and actually became closer than we ever were. We shared a storage unit together and had to deal with that from time to time. I was very open with my communication with guys in front of John at first because I had nothing to hide. Then one day he confronted me about it and told me he didn’t like me talking to my ex and that I needed to stop. I reassured him there was nothing going on and nothing to worry about. Mike had called me one day in regards to our storage unit. I thought nothing of it, but John asked to use my phone one night, and ended up going through it and saw that I spoke to Mike. He freaked out and told me that I seriously need to stop talking to him or else we are through. Mike and I had been friends for nearly ten years and dated for four of those years. I did not want to throw away our friendship for someone I had just met. So I started hiding the fact that I talked to him. I went against everything I believed in. One night after I fell asleep John went through my phone again and saw Mike and I had talked on the phone that day. He completely lost it!! He woke me up screaming and freaking out. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before. He ended up in the corner of the room in a fetal position rocking back and forth crying. I didn’t know what to do. It was the middle of the night and I was mentally sleeping still. He told me to get the hell out of his house so I started packing up my stuff. He then freaked out and asked me what the hell I thought I was doing. From there on out things got worse and worse until I finally had had enough. I broke up with him over Thanksgiving break when I had gone home for vacation because he accused me of sleeping with all of my guy friends while I was there. I never knew just how crazy things were going to become.
When I got back into town John blew up my phone. He called me 56 times in one night alone. I then
found out he was stalking me and sitting outside of my house to make sure I didn’t have anyone over.
He would tell me things he saw me doing and people he saw me with. I was looking over my shoulder every chance I got. He sent me nasty emails, text messages, and voicemails. One time he left me a voicemail saying I needed to go to the doctor to get myself checked because I gave him something. I called him back to find out what he was talking about and asked what it was exactly I gave him. The disease he said I gave him I had gotten an immunization for before starting college. When I told him it was impossible for me to have it because I got the shot protecting me from it he started laughing and said “Now you know what it’s like to worry. It’s not fun is it?” At that very moment I began blocking him from every form of technology possible. Apparently when it comes to dealing with a psycho that is not enough. He started contacting my friends and family and harassing them as well. It seriously felt as if I was one step closer to having my head put in a freezer.
Luckily, he eventually found another girl to distract his time with and slowly started to leave me alone. I then moved back home and contact from him ceased altogether. I was finally done with him... or so I thought. A year later he created another Facebook account that I didn’t have blocked and started contacting me again apologizing for everything. He went on and on telling me how sorry he was that he let me go. That I was the best thing that ever happened to him and that he is kicking himself in the ass that it took him this long to see it. He said the way he acted when we were together wasn’t the real him and that he let his insecurities get in the way of his judgment. He told me that I deserve nothing short of amazing when I find the lucky guy who wins my heart. It became very laughable and a great form of entertainment. It was really all a bunch of mumbo jumbo that I honestly couldn’t care less to listen to. So I blocked that Facebook account. Then he created another and another and I blocked them all.While in the relationship things honestly didn’t look as bad as they really were. For some reason I could not find the strength to walk away as early as I should have. He brainwashed me right off the bat. I never believed in the possibility of brainwashing until I actually went through it. After I broke free from his insanity and got the chance to look back on what I went through I cringe. I have, however, become stronger and more knowledgeable from the experience and because of that I do not regret it.
Lesson: If you see early warning signs of the crazy, it's probably safe to assume you're right and run like hell in the other direction.
